Callie's Law

I really do enjoy blogging in a Dougie Howser kinda way (but without the theme music in the background and the 80s computer).  There are times during a week that I take a step back and mentally "blog" about an event that happened, or take a mental note to blog about something that has already happened.  Too bad my mental notes are written with invisible ink and I've lost the decoder.  I'll do my best to recap:

I like to try to keep positive on here, but I also need to be honest and share a frustration in my journey.  There have been a few days lately I feel like I'm living out Murphy's Law, so much so I'm pretty sure it should be renamed after me.  Whoever thought having kids two years apart and staying at home to raise them would be a good idea?  Certainly it couldn't have been me, could it?!  Last week on my first outing to the grocery store with both kids, Callie's Law kicked in full swing.  Three-fourths of the way done with shopping, feeling pretty great about my awesome momabilities, Q threw up all over the place.  People, it was a gusher.  Thankfully the people at Nature's Pantry surrounded me and made me feel as good as a frazzled, frantic mom can feel.  Alas, it was short-lived for as soon as I got home the real fun began...for a week.  Poor little guy - for the first 6 wks of H's life, he's been sick for at least 4 of them!  (And in my sad, sorry state can I just say poor me?!  I decided my new job title would be firefighter...as I've spent many hours running back and forth from one fire to another.  I'm not sure how my husband works as an administrator.  He does this with other people's kids! No thanks!!)

Don't get me wrong, I love my responsibilities.  I get to be there for milestones and help mold how my kids view themselves and the world.  (Too bad I'll be bald by the time they're old enough to thank me for it all.)

One of my mental notes was to write about making time to stop and kick the dirt (my toddler is a boy after all and would much rather stop to kick dirt than smell roses).  There's no hurrying when you have a toddler.  Some days I want to pull out my hair and some days I'm able to stop, take a deep breath and look at the world through his eyes.  All the beauty, newness, wonder and joy...

Finally a proper visit from Granny D and Granddad!
They showed up in the middle of the night and this is everyone's first chance to get cozy.
We had a great Spring Break with them.

Mema and Papa with H at Jillie and Jarett's bday party.

Q loves him some Capri Sun and his Aunt Marcy.
This is post-swim at the bday party.

Q wanted to show his grandparents his favorite walking spot at Burr Oak.
Of course, no walk is complete without a proper walking stick.

Post sickies (for like the gazillionth time) here is Q planting our first seeds for the garden.
Quite awesome to use the rich black soil from the garden. Composters unite!
It was such a nice day, I ended up barricading the steps and Q played on our (in much need of a new paint job) deck. 

And here's Sissie in all of her glory just chillin' while Q and Mommy make a mess on the deck.

I hope someday my kids will be able to understand me when I thank them for helping mold how I view the world and myself. (Maybe Callie's Law isn't so bad after all.)

Year in review

My husband sent me a copy of a post I did a while back to show me how much our son has grown...well it was really to remind me how Q used to look like Uncle Fester :)  I'd been thinking about the blog from time to time, but didn't realize a year had passed!! Where do I even begin? How do I even sum up a year? 

Here goes an honest effort...

Playdate with Mom at the park!  Check out the hat she made me :)
16 mo

Trip to TX to visit the grandparents and of course to feed the ducks and geese.
Pretty sure little man needed time to warm up...
17 mo

Day at the zoo to celebrate he's going to be a big brother!
Check out his shirt - Daddy dressed him appropriately for the day :)
18 mo

Lucky Streich at the Irish Fest.  How cute is that belly?
19 mo

Standing in front of the stage where Mr. Stinky Feet is playing.
Couldn't care less about the music...let's play swords!
19 mo

While the cat's away, the mice will play...sorta.
I was out with friends and boys got locked out of the house!!
Good thing Daddy had the camera to document it all :)
Q was glad for the endless supply of cherry tomatoes from the garden.
I can't remember who got to change those diapers :)
20 mo

Hooray for homemade playdoh!
You can tell by his chin he did try a sample...yuck!
This was the second craft of the day, as evidenced by the paint on his belly.
21 mo

Granny D in town and off to the pumpkin patch we go at The Big Red Barn.
Where was Granddad?  Off being a manly-man hunting in CO.
22 mo

Halloween, my boys dressed as Batman and Robin.  Yup, I made the Robin suit!!
With my growing belly, we joked I should've dressed as the Penguin.
22 mo

Weekend trip to Tulsa for a wedding, we detoured with the g'rents to the aquarium.
This was right before Q used the saltwater to "fix" his hair.
22 mo

Thanksgiving in Iowa
Hanging with Great-grandma Clara
22 mo

Finally, Mom realizes and embraces it's time for a haircut.
I'm just not so sure about it!
23 mo

Ok. ok, it wasn't so bad.
Thanks, Amy!!
23 mo

It's my birthday!!!!!
24 mo

Two Today :)
(Complete with spaghetti face)

Thomas the Train cake!!
Best part/best gift was the train on top :)
24 mo

Just call me Joey..Woah! ("Blossom", anyone?)
Went to Animal Tails our friends at Illusions Unlimited created.
Mom's trying to keep us busy before the baby comes!
25 mo

Here she is!!!!  Welcome to the world, baby girl!
2/10

Getting dressed by Mama.  Look at all my hair!

In-house photo shoot.
Daddy was NOT happy with the foo foo.

First bath at home.  H did a great job not crying, but Daddy figured he'd
try to make it all better anyway.

Smokin on the hookah...
Poor Q got sick a few days before H was born.. He had the flu!!
Here he is being a big boy doing breathing treatments and watching none other than Elmo.
We had to keep the kids separate for the first couple of weeks.
Immediately after the flu, he got slammed with a dbl ear infection, cold, and tonsilitis!  H also ended up with a cold.
Can you say stressful?!

Here's Granny D and Granddad in their quick meeting of H.
Can't wait to see you again Spring Break.

Finally, no more sickies and a chance to love on baby sis!
My heart sings watching how loving Q can be with H. He wants so much to be helpful.
Many mornings when he wakes, the first word out his mouth is her name.

I'm crazy bucket head, now gimme some candy!
Having fun playing while sister naps.

Awesome Saturday morning a few days ago.
Q LOVES to scoop and I totally don't mind finding stray rice pieces in weird areas of the house :)

Our activity yesterday - making glue for paper mache.

All set - even equipped with a sweet "apron" we got from Urgent Care on our trip the night before H was born.
My plan was to make a paper mache penguin out of the creamer bottle.
Too bad I forgot Q doesn't like to get his hands dirty with anything other than dirt :)
Epic Fail!

And we're up to today!!  We took an awesome hike on a trail at Burr Oak.
Here's Q playing in a fallen log.
I'm appropriately trying to give a science lesson.

H's sweet ride today.

Thank goodness for the Ergo!!
Q on back, H in the stroller.
Rock on!!

Now, if I can juuust get their scrapbooks and baby books updated...

Waiting for paint to dry

It can be nerve-wracking waiting for paint to dry.  Your careful planning matching shades of paint swatches to your comforter and furniture, all the dadgum prep work…taping for what seems like days and days…

When that fresh coat of paint is applied you realize it’s not the color you thought it was.  The shade is off just enough it doesn’t match what you tried so hard to get.  The undertone’s too gray, or too purple…something’s just not quite right.  You know it’s what you’re supposed to have because the swatch matched perfectly.  You looked at it in natural light, yellow light…all the possible lights that could be used in that room.  You gave it to the professional to color the paint just right.  But on your wall, it fails to meet expectation.

As I’ve been painting, I can’t help but feel the anxiety of my project.  I decided to paint vertical stripes (91 to be exact) in our bedroom.  Working only during my son’s naps (usually too beat to work much in the evenings) it’s taken me about a week to paint two coats of the first color, then tape, tape, tape and more tape. I’m finally applying the first coat of the darker shade today.  And it looks off.  It doesn’t even go with the first color.  The two swatches I got from the store were partners.  My brain knows that wet paint is a different shade than when it dries.  My eyes are telling me a different story, and my stomach agrees with anxiety.

As I try to calm my nerves (seriously, folks I’ve worked REAL hard for this not to work!), I try to think about how this applies to life and our journey.  We are so much like that wet-paint:

Our ‘finish’ can change if someone brushes up against us at vulnerable times without thinking (or knowing) to help repair the damage.  We need relationships to mold us and to support us.  Even if that swipe that wasn’t meant to be isn’t resolved by the perpetrator, we still play out that hurt in other relationships until we learn to heal.

We’re rarely polished after that first try (paint usually requires 2-3 coats – even painter/primer I’m finding out).

In the process of paint being made until it dries on the wall, it’s as if to say God’s not done with us yet.  God’s constantly working in us and through us.

In order for paint to be what we need it to be it must start as a clean slate then be mixed with experience, shaken, stirred, opened and made vulnerable to the workings of the artist (God), change shapes, and wait for all of these to come together to dry.

            I have so many relationships that I think – ah, if I could just do this part over…or do the whole thing over.  Or, if I saw that person now I could explain to them how I’ve changed or that I’m not that same person any more.  But we don’t get the option of do-overs and rarely do we get to “prove” that we’ve changed.  Our lives are wet paint.  We’re not done.  We’re not even the shade that we could be juuuust yet.  Those past experiences we desire to change are just us being shaken, stirred, opened and made vulnerable.

The wet paint idea can be applied to life in general and it can also be applied to various circumstances.  My life has been a myriad of opportunities trying to figure out “what I want to be when I grow up.”  Never have I been able to answer that with 100% certainty.  I feel pressure of being identified by what you do.  I want an identity!  But I don’t want it to be defined by what I do for a job.  I’m a paint of various shades.  I really like doing sooo many things, it’s hard for me to settle on one.  As I searched for “what I’m supposed to be” I tried on different hats.  Wait, paint doesn’t wear hats.  Hmm…different analogy needed here.  I tried out different tones…??...I can’t help but think about a chameleon here.  There’s a negative connotation there I don’t want.  I’ll have to work on a better analogy.  For now, just go with a blob of paint wearing a hat.  I have had some friends support me through each of these ventures, some of the ventures, or none of the ventures.  I’m trying a couple new things that for once I feel great about.  Yea, it can be difficult when I don’t feel the support from certain people…but what’s important is that I’m finding the validation within.  The paint isn’t dry yet.  People will come around (or they won’t).  What’s important is knowing that I’m just the right shade I need to be right now in this process.

I’ve always been a fan of Weird Al.  It was a tradition to listen to his parodies as we drove the 8 hours every summer to get to church camp.  He never sang about drugs or sex and he never cursed.  Good, clean fun J  He’s recently come out with a children’s book that speaks to my heart.  It’s about an eight-year-old boy that’s answering the question of what he wants to be when he grows up.  The moral of Al’s story is that we shouldn’t be defined by what we do for a living.  The important thing is to find something you love and THEN try to make a living out of it.  This will be a staple in my house.  “The Journey is the Destination (Tom’s Shoes).” 

Waiting for paint to dry can be a beautiful thing not only as I anticipate the outcome of honest effort, but of the effort itself.

Just another day in Paradise...

Paradise Park, that is!  Jen and I had a great time taking our toddlers to the park.  It was great to get out of the house (aaaahhhhhhh!!!!!  stir-crazy mama!) and take Quinn to a new place.  We didn't hit up all the fun spots, but the boys had tons of fun.  I think they would've been happier if they could've gone into the ball pit, but that'll have to wait a year or so.  Jen and I cracked up that most of the dirty toys needing to be cleaned were from our boys sticking them in their mouths.  Oops!

It's been a blessing having Jen and Josh for my adult-time and Quinn's kid-time.  (In case you're confused, Jen is for my adult-time, not Josh :)  )

They almost look like they were caught doing something they shouldn't be doing

Aw, yeah.  I lifted this big cylinder on my own.  And I look dang cute doing it, too!

I posed just for you, Mommy :) 

Ok, so you sat me here and now you've taken my picture.  Can I go play?

Hey, where'd Josh go?

Pizzaaaaaaa!!!!!

Such a good helper doing KP

Plant-based life

I've been amazed at the transition...My husband and I used to consider heating up frozen veggies w/loads of shredded cheese on it in the microwave as "eating our vegetables."  Now, everything I cook begins, ends and is filled in the middle with something plant-based.  I have the most yummy meal heating in the oven and just wanted to share a couple of my recent favorite recipes.

Vegan Nacho Stuffed Shells I forgot and used the black beans in another recipe this week and I used chili beans instead. This is what I'm currently waiting on in the oven :)  Yummy cheezy goodness!!

Vegan Open-Faced Tempeh Reuben Still not sure the vegan-ability of some store-bought bread so I made homemade tortillas to eat w/.  I admit this doesn't taste like the real thing, but it is still good.

Homemade Tortillas I used whole wheat flour and canola oil instead of shortening to make them healthier; the recipe IS vegan as-is

Creamy Peanut Butter smoothie Don't knock the spinach in the recipe - you can't even taste it!!

If you make any of these recipes, let me know what you think!!